The Proud or the Pious?

For the past several months there has been a tugging at my heart. I've been considering for some time the act of sacrifice and of giving. The first thing that came to mind was to give up clothing, and that is primarily what I've been caught up on. It started with a small idea, but it has gotten lodged deep down in my brain. Should I give up my clothes until I have only the bare necessities? I was thinking about this for quite a while when I finally bought Shane Claiborne's book "Irresistible Revolution." Now, I know some of you may not be too big on the guy, and I kind of understand. However, the mere message of the book has been striking some resounding chords down within me as I turn every page. Shane has lived a true life of abandonment and
"radical" living. (Sleeping in leper colonies, living among poverty and constantly giving to those immediately around him, acting socially against injustice, and making his own clothes). He claims to find Christ in those around him who he helps (Not to mention Jesus promised us that would happen way before Shane). I keep wondering if God is calling me to a life of abandonment, and it just so happens that my starting point has been my clothes. These, however, are some of the thoughts that have kept me from carrying this out.
First and foremost, giving up clothes is a fairly humbling action--to be seen in the same outfit over and over, to have to figure out washing schedules, the potential smell issue--But I know just how screwed up and prideful I really am, and I know that I could take something so pious, as giving my clothes away to the needy and defying materialism, and turn it into a source of pride. People would notice. People may think its weird. People would think its ultra-spiritual (many people will anyway.) So, do I do something that could potentially put all eyes on me, and stroke that huge ego I already have?
Secondly, I wondered what side of the line I am on between earning my salvation or actions of mere love. Am I motivated to do this out of a desire to know Christ in the people I help, or am I earning His favor with drastic actions? The latter would anger God more than touch Him.
Thirdly, am I deciding to give up clothes so that it is more of a fashionable sacrifice as opposed to true sacrifice? Rugged, ragged, and dirty is kind of..."in." Am I, in all actuality, just looking to make a fashion statement rather than a statement of love (As odd as that statement may be)?
And I have a lot of other questions about my motives such as:
Am I looking to give up clothing, so I'm off the hook with giving up sin?
Am I looking to help people only in a way that is exciting? (What about the kid that just wants me to spend half an hour with him?)
Am I really a whitewashed tomb?

Listen, by sending this into cyberspace for whomever to read, I'm not trying to let one hand know what the other is doing. I am merely telling my right hand, "Dude, this left hand guy, is really screwed up."

So what comes first: the correct motive and then the action, or visa versa?




Oh...and don't give me any crap about all my clothes being too small for anyone to wear anyway!!

Oh...That's me

I'm a youth minister just outside Knoxville, TN. The other night, I was rushing around the parking lot trying to get my kids seated in the van. We were about to take off to play putt-putt. One of my youth sponsors just got a new digital camera that is truly great quality. She was snapping pictures left and right, and we would all gather around her to give "Oooohs" and "Aaaaahs," As she showed us her snapshots in the screen.

Her son, Josh, who we call Little Buddy, got hold of the camera. He was running around taking shots. Suddenly, as I walked briskly across the parking lot to check in with another driver, I realized that Josh was behind me with the camera aimed closely at my face.


Now, allow me to be honest. I thought, "Yes, the perfect candid picture I have always wanted!Myspace better get ready for MYFACE. HAHAHAHAHA."


I looked over my shoulder and gave Josh the coolest rockstar stare I could muster up. Not enough to be snobby, but just enough to tell the world...I know, I know. This is what He took:




I'm a mix between Sonic the Hedgehog and The Other Sister.

This happens to me every once in a while. I'll get ready in the morning and look at myself in the mirror the way I want to see myself. I'll kinda look at the mirror with squinty eyes and think...yeeeessss...

Then, I'll be talking to my roommate later in the day without consciously thinking how I look. My eyes will glance across the room, and I'll see myself in the mirror either laughing or listening or something...and I'll be caught off guard. Oh...so that's what I really look like.

I kinda like those moments actually. Its those moments that take the pressure off. Its God's way of sucking a little more pride out of my soul. Its also His way of saying, "Well, at least you're kinda funny. "

I do hope that no one takes this as a pitty party. I'm really ok with how I look and I feel secure in this. Thank You, God, for humbling me. I don't need man's approval!

If anyone wants to pay me huge compliments, here's your cue.

A Friend, A Bag of Chips

So, this is my new blog.

I'm at my friends' house, and I sat at the computer screen for five minutes trying to decide what title I should give my blog. (I know...I'm at a friend's house, and I'm blogging...lame). As I sat staring, I heard Tyler in the kitchen go, "mmmm..." Obviously, he found the snack he had been striving after. He rounded the corner holding an open bag of Salt and Vinegar chips with his arm outstrechted in my direction. The other hand was cramming sixteen chips into his watering mouth.

"Want some?" He said kindly.
"What are those?" I asked, not able to see the label on the bag.
He turned it around until I was able to read "Lays Salt and Vinegar."
"Mmmmm...Salt and Vineger" I said slowly, "Those are important."
After a brief pause, Tyler asked, "Did you just say 'Those are important?'"
"Mm-hm" I said, my mouth full of chips.

Its good to have friends. Its better to have friends who freely offer their chips.

So, there you have it...my first post.